Happiness and Commitment

Happiness and Commitment

Happiness and Commitment

Before starting, I must confess that as a person of faith, I write from the heart.

I realize many have various faiths, and today’s message is not meant to proselytize.

I respect your time reading what I write and your beliefs.

As I thought about today’s topic, two words continued to resonate within my mind: happiness and commitment.

I believe it is a matter of staying on the course that I’ve set out for myself and doing the things required, one step at a time, to get there.

We are all committed to something in our lives, such as our relationships, long-term goals, vision boards, college aspirations, health goals, business goals, and happiness.  These are just a few to get you thinking about the word commitment.

As each of us lives out our lives, I’m sure one of the ones listed above may resonate with you today, or maybe not.

I’ll use happiness as a commitment.  I’ve learned, the only person that matters in my life towards happiness is me.

I’m not selfish; however, I can only be accountable for my happiness.  You can only be responsible for your happiness.  How I find happiness is up to me.  I also know that we can help others be happy through our dispositions.

My go-to quote is by the 14th Dalia Lama, also the highest spiritual leader and head of Tibet, that I will share with you regarding this statement.  It’s one that I’ve frequently used and reflected on ever since I read the quote.   “Don’t let the behaviors of others destroy your inner peace.”

As one who practices mindfulness, I’m constantly reminded daily not to get caught up in the cares of the world that can destroy my inner peace.

As I mentioned upfront, being a person of faith, I realize I can’t let my humanity get in front of my divinity.

I’m reminded by what’s written in Matthew 18:18 “Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be bound in heaven, and whatever you loose on earth will be loosed in heaven.” It’s also written in (Mt 16:19) as I give you context, as you discover for yourself later.

These scriptures are powerful words in my faith and those who believe.  I believe it plays out every day in our lives as we establish better relationships with others.

Too often, I’ve noticed how small storms can easily rock my world and rob me of my peace of mind.  However; through meditation and making it a daily practice to focus on God, I can weather every storm and adversity.   Many things are beyond our control; once we are aware, we can choose to let it go or hold on to it.  The choice is ours.  “Don’t let the behaviors of others destroy your inner peace.”

Because I’ve been writing five things down to be grateful for each day since April 2020, I can see the impacts of doing these things consistently over time and how they add up.

I call it a force multiplier.  Mainly because what I have learned has allowed me to grow exponentially!  I’ve built something inside me that I can’t explain toward happiness.

When I had a bad day or a small storm, I wrote patience and peace when I did not allow my inner peace to be destroyed.   Patience is something that is one of the fruits of the Holy Spirit.

https://www.learnreligions.com/the-fruits-of-the-holy-spirit-542103

I’ve also learned it’s not about me; I must die to self-daily.

In doing so, I’ve learned how to travel the high road and go the second mile, not just the first.

What the Bible says about Going the Extra Mile (bibletools.org)

I let it go, so I stated, “I’m not being selfish by any means; however, I can only be accountable for my happiness.”

“If you feel gratitude, it means you think that someone has just demonstrated that he or she cares about you as a person and will be there for you in the future.  Gratitude marks opportunities to solidify relationships with people who seem to care.” Dr. Martin E. P. Seligman

What about you and your commitment to happiness?

As an avid reader, two of my favorite books by Dr. Martin Seligman are “Flourish and Learned Optimism.”

I continue to draw upon these two self-help books and his theories of well-being and positive psychology even today.

Martin E.P. Seligman | Positive Psychology Center (upenn.edu)

Martin Seligman Biography and Psychological Theories (verywellmind.com)

In his book “Flourish” Seligman presents the acronym PERMA, tied to happiness.

P – Positive Emotions – feeling love, joy, and pleasure.

E – Engagement–being in flow and focused on our activities.

R – Relationships – having healthy, supportive, and rewarding connections with others.

M – Meaning – giving significance to the events in our lives.

A – Accomplishments – attaining goals that support our core values.

If you are looking for a reason to be happy, read some of the work Dr. Martin Seligman accomplished during his lifetime.

Over ten years ago, when I attended Penn University of Pennsylvania as a Resiliency Instructor, I learned about my signature strengths.  I also learned to “Hunt the Good Stuff!”

www.authentichappiness.org

I also learned years later about the Kipp Character Report Card.  I would challenge you to see what some children who live in NYC below their means are graded on for their report cards.  Growing up, I went to P.S. 104 in Brooklyn and lived there as an adult in 1993, so I know this is for the 21st century.

The KIPP Report Card – The Key(s) To Success (weebly.com)

KIPP NYC Character Report Card and Supporting Materials.pdf – Google Drive

QnA_on_KIPP_NYCs_Approach_to_Character.pdf

As an Educator with a master’s in education, I often think about what we are measuring today in our schools.  I’m concerned with all the political rhetoric around education today. Are we doing enough in America for our Children by preparing them for the future?

I’ve given you plenty to think about toward “Happiness and Commitment,” and now it’s up to you!  The question is how you are measuring up?

I’ll close by saying if you want happiness, you must be committed to getting it.

The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts: therefore, guard accordingly, and take care that you entertain no notions unsuitable to virtue and reasonable nature. – Marcus Aurelius

The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts. – Marcus Aurelius – Quotespedia.org

2 comments

  1. McKinley, thank you for sharing your thoughts on happiness. I struggle with allowing myself to be happy, and it bothers me. I don’t want the regret of letting outside influences affect how I feel. I know being unhappy is a choice that only I can choose. Today I choose happiness!!

    1. Scott,
      Thank you so much for your personal testimony. Part of the process is knowing. Now that you know, take a moment in time by doing a mental assessment of yourself and go beyond the norm. Sometimes we need to unlearn and re-learn new habits. We must be trained, practiced, and refined. I’m refining every day!
      McKinley

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