Amazingly, the month of June is already here.
Can you believe that five full months have passed already, and school is out for the summer in some states?
As I thought about today’s topic, I wondered what I had put off from not doing as well as others.
In the military, if we didn’t want to put something in a soldier’s File, we might say it’s in “File 13.” Also, if we had something to file that we didn’t want others to know about or forget, that was also put in File 13. Then and only then, it went into the trash can, if they didn’t act up again.
https://digitalcultures.net/slang/pop-culture/file-13/
How many times have you placed something in the proverbial File 13 that you forgot about that didn’t require you to revisit?
I’m sure none of you are procrastinators and have not put off various tasks that you intended to finish by now.
We have various priorities in life we want to accomplish, or at least I do.
What still resonates with me are the words of one of my fellow Toastmasters, who told me years ago, “Sometimes we get thrown a curve ball out of left field.”
Well, as my fate would have it, I was thrown a curve ball out of left field last Friday.
I received a text message from my neighbor’s wife across the street, from where I had lived for almost thirteen years, stating that her husband had passed away from ALS.
Amyotrophic lateral sclerosis (ALS) – Symptoms and causes – Mayo Clinic
He was a man who always played with his German Shepherd, Diego, in the yard and loved to do yard work.
My heart immediately sank, and my day or weekend was different.
As the day went on, I thought about my missed opportunities to see her husband while he was still alive.
Last November, my wife and I intentionally stopped by their home unannounced to visit when we heard of his illness. However, we spoke only with his wife because he could not take company due to his condition.
Had I been more intentional, I could have made a second visit when I returned to the area the second time for an unplanned funeral for my Pastor, who suddenly died two days after Easter. However, it was not possible with a tight schedule to return home.
We tend to take things for granted that people will get better until we are called to attend a funeral.
Unfortunately, his recent death in May was unexpected, just like the Pastor who died two days after Easter.
I’m reminded of what the Bible says about never knowing the time, day, or the hour.
In his case, his wife told me he was shopping for wedding attire online for his only daughter’s wedding, which takes place in less than two weeks before she headed to Texas.
I’ve met his parents when their Big RV showed up in the neighborhood. During the initial introduction with his father, we learned we were Paratroopers and became good friends because of our military backgrounds.
Even after his parents returned home, he would say his father asked about me.
It’s interesting as I thought about all the memories I shared over the last 13-plus years that were in the back of my mind.
It’s also interesting how the death of a person can bring forth specific beautiful memories in life from the people we know.
Through this person, I could taste what deer meat tasted like as he went into his freezer and gave me some deer steaks. He said it was like Salisbury steak if you cook it right.
We didn’t cook it right and never had it again.
It was another reminder that we can’t forget what is essential at the beginning of the year and then wonder where the time went.
What have you placed in file 13 that you need to revisit?
The fact that we will be thrown curve balls out of left field is a given if we live long enough.
I’m also aware that if everything is important, nothing is.
Every family can probably relate to the madness of competing priorities as long as their arms. I still have priorities I must manage daily, such as taking care of my health and my wife’s care while maintaining a quality of life.
I often tell people I’m busier now than when I had a full-time job.
On this day, what are you placing in the back of your mind that requires immediate attention today?
One of my favorite psychiatrists and psychoanalysts is Carl Gustav Jung because of his talks about making the unconscious mind conscious.
Jungian Psychology: Unraveling the Unconscious Mind (positivepsychology.com)
There is a silver lining to today’s blog that I will close on. Many of you may know or may not know that I have been bringing Holy Communion to a Fellow Brother Knight for almost three years. He is also a soldier and will be 103 years old on August 3rd if It’s God’s will.
Nevertheless, this past Saturday, while giving him an update and Holy Communion, we talked about the recent 2024 Sickle Cell Walk that happened over the weekend, which our organization supports each year. I told him who was there and that our Grand Knight’s Son was with his entire family on the walk.
Through that conversation, he remembered every detail of the wedding he attended 16 years ago for the Grand Knight’s son and his family before they had children.
How would I know that? Out of curiosity, I called the Grand Knights Son and asked when he was married (July 2008), where he was married (Macon, GA), although not Augusta; it was close enough. I also asked when he sang in the choir with his mother (2001) which was spot on.
There was nothing in his File 13 as he vividly, through our conversation, provided me with information without prodding or hints.
In this situation, I feel so blessed to help keep his mind active every time I visit and reminisce about the good old days in the military as soldiers.
I don’t know about you, but if I live to be 102 years old, if my memory is as sharp as his, I’ll take it.
He was able to bring the unconscious conscious.
“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate.” ~ C.G. Jung
Have a fantastic week as you clean out or open various life memories.
Remember, now is the time to remember that we can all be thrown a curve ball out of left field any day.
Some people call it “manifesting”, and some just relate it to their relationship with God, but I’ve seen that crazy ideas will generate into reality from visualization. It’s happened in many others’ lives, such as Jim Carrey https://www.cheatsheet.com/entertainment/why-jim-carrey-wrote-himself-a-10-million-check-before-he-was-famous.html/. I don’t know if I’ve had premonitions or visualizations, but they’ve happened to me a lot, throughout my life, and I’ve seen it with others. For example, I remember as a kid (like elementary) wanting to own a sports league, but I never thought about it again (totally off the radar for 35yrs), but then it suddenly came into my lap, like it was destiny.
Greg,
Thank you for your insights about today’s blog.
Continue manifesting those thoughts.
Great examples about life and dreams.
McKinley
Thank you for this deep and thought provoking message.
I will be doing a tribute at my mother’s “Celebration of Life Service” on Saturday, June 8. As I prepare, I am reflecting and the memories are flooding my mind. Indeed, it has led me to take some things out of File 13. We continue the journey of life being hit by curve balls or can we dodge some of them??!!
PRA Shirley,
First and foremost, condolences to you and your family for the passing of your mother. I truly understand about thoughts flooding your mind.
I pray that your memories are long lasting and that you’re able to continue the journey of life in any capacity that works best for you.
McKinley
At this point in my life, curveballs still irritate me. However, regardless of how curveballs present, I recognize that curveballs have always provided me with opportunities to adapt, reflect, change course, or get ready to recycle. Not too long ago, I was elated with my new job. The kids were adorable, the parents were welcoming, the principal was kind and committed, and a day did not go by without a teacher stopping by to thank me for being at their school. Two months into the job, the wind shifted, and I instinctively knew the “trip” was about to kick-off. I was not only devastated but furious because I knew I had to “suit-up” …again.
Fitting-in (my old nemesis) has always been a challenge for me especially when it comes to doing a job that depends on ethical behaviors. This time, the “curveball” presented as follow: a few teachers were pushing back on my operational standards because I was not responding or aligning with cultural expectations. To be clear, the way some of the teachers talked about students and their family during meetings and around the school was unethical, prejudicial, and cowardly -a lawsuit waiting to happen. The storm came to a head when my principal told me that this was his school and that I WILL share confidential information with the teachers (period). Welllll, thanks to all the irritable curveballs of the past, I calmly gave him paragraph line and number regarding the legal and ethical duty of counselors and how any breach of confidentiality could cost me my license. As expected, there was more push back on the rights to confidential information. It was certainly intense but with an exit plan in mind, I softly pointed out all that had been working before I took on the job as a school counselor and advised that based on budget cuts, perhaps he should consider hiring someone less experienced who appreciates fitting- in more than building trusting-relationships.
So then, he ordered me not to quit (???). Does this mean he tossed me in file 13?
To any reader of this entry, what do you think was the reason for my latest curveball?
Regards,
FSJ
FSJ,
What a powerful example that you provided concerning curveballs. The military has done you well as it relates to seeing something-say something. In reading you may have been Black Balled. If people tend to be unethical in certain situations, it’s hard to recover from my standpoint. I think that you will have a decision to make soon and that what you said went on deaf ears. I don’t think you want any breach of confidentiality that could cost you your license.
CM
No more important “stuff” in file 13. Life is too short to put off what is most important to us. People first always!!
Scott,
You’re correct “Life is too short to put off what is most important to us.”
McKinley